Taking care of a newborn is definitely a challenge and even that is an understatement. Our first night home was horrible. Little H was 3 days old and my milk started coming in. The engorgement felt horrible. My first attempt at using a breast pump was an utter failure. It hurt so badly and it just felt weird. And for some reason, I didn't think to purchase breast pads for the leakage. Then, we tried to put Little H to bed. We put her in her cute little newborn onesie, then wrapped her in the awesome fleece sleep sack the hospital gave us, rocked her to sleep, and put her in her bassinet perfectly placed next to my side of the bed. But she didn't stay asleep. Somehow between the stay at the hospital and home, she no longer slept for hours at a time at night. Also, through trial and error, we would come to find out that she loathes swaddles, sleep sacks, or anything that restricts her arms. The solution? Just leave her arms out! Except she has a pretty intense startle reflex, so within minutes of putting down this beautiful sleeping baby, she's awake. I can't even begin to share how many different things we've tried, but as of now, she will not sleep on her own. To save our sanity, we became co-sleepers. I have to admit that I have a healthy nervousness about it every night, but Little H really seems to love it. At 6 weeks old, she sleeps 4-5 hours straight and she loves either sleeping on DeeJ's chest or snuggled next to me.
We're also 6 weeks into breastfeeding. The L&D nurse who delivered Little H gave me a quick tutorial right after she was born and several other nurses commented that I looked like a pro. I didn't actually see a Lactation Consultant until an hour before I was discharged and when we left the hospital, I was pretty confident. Within a week, not so much. I think my nerves got the best of me on top of just being new to it. I struggled with whether or not she was getting enough milk. It didn't help that she lost 7 ounces between her birth date and our date of discharge. I didn't know that weight loss was common so I was scrutinizing every diaper change and count like it was my sole purpose in life. I became a pro at reading hunger cues. Something else I didn't know, crying is a late hunger cue. I analyzed every lip smack, head butt, and sucking motion. Then, about a week into exclusively breastfeeding, Little H and I had latching issues. I couldn't help her latch, she would become frustrated and start punching me. I would end up having to pump and give her a bottle, which made me nervous about causing nipple confusion. I felt rejected. I really thought she no longer wanted my breast and it made me very sad. I even purchased nipple shields and we had some success with that, but it wasn't consistent. At the urging of DeeJ, I called the hospital's Lactation Consultant for advice. After speaking with her, she referred me to a private specialist who could see me one on one for a fee. I was a little bummed and at fault. It made me seriously regret that I didn't meet with the consultant more than once while I was in the hospital. But no matter, I was in whatever it takes mode. While wrapping up the conversation with the consultant, she recommended holding my nipple to form a smaller shape. Maybe Little H can't latch because of that? She compared it to trying to hold a blown up balloon with your mouth. A light bulb went off in my head. Why in the hell didn't I think of that? So at our next session, I tried that and it worked! I was so relieved and thankful. And here we are 5 weeks later and our sessions are generally pretty good. She still gets frustrated very easily and punches, but it's not very often.
All of our pediatrician appointments have gone well. Little H went from 5 pounds and 15 ounces at hospital discharge and 3 days old to 6 pounds and 12 ounces at 10 days old! Then she had another weigh in at 1 month old and was 8 pounds and 3 ounces which is amazing! She also grew from 19 inches to 21 inches within a month. We did have an issue with her newborn screening that required a retest, but we've been told that the abnormality in her first set of results were likely due to a false positive.
Anyhoo, I'm happy to report that all is well! Being sleep deprived has just become a way of life in our home, but gosh, Little H is so awesome. She's beautiful, smart, and all that I could ever ask for. Here is us baby wearing a week and a half ago:
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